update and a song for Mike

It’s been another crazy week.

Last week Mike was admitted to the hospital with what they thought was pneumonia (still not sure at this point). He was very sick – almost like last summer, sweating profusely, coughing and fevers. They treated him with IV antibiotics, fluids and steroids. On Thursday he started a 4 day chemotherapy treatment, 24 hours each, back to back. It seemed that made him even sicker. He was not eating anything and the little he tried to eat, he would throw up. A week later, he has lost almost 20 pounds (30 since Christmas). We have been visiting him on and off but he has mostly been sleeping. I talked to him this morning and he sounded better but was still very nauseous. They are planning to do a lumbar puncture in the morning to put chemo meds into his spinal fluid and to check to see how much leukemia (if any) is still in his system. He should be released to come home shortly after that. We will meet with his doctor this week to get this rest of his regimen after they determine the results of his LP tomorrow.

Thanks to everyone for all of the support we have received (especially this past week!). Mike’s mom flew in to be here last week, so it is a huge relief to me to feel like I can balance everything; and my brother and Zack have been taking care of things around the house that Mike would normally do. So many of you have reached out to check on me & the kids or help out with picking up random items and dropping them off. It definitely makes a BIG difference for me and the kids! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!

This afternoon I actually got a few hours to myself in a quiet house, so I decided to write. Writing is such therapy for me; I wish I had more time to do it. Here’s the result…

Song for Mike

Every time I have to leave your side, a piece of my heart breaks
I know I gotta be strong, no matter what it takes
Fighting to believe, everyday, that you’re gonna get better
Balancing my happy thoughts to weigh more than fear and anger
So often I look back to the days, when we were just two kids
Dreaming dreams bigger than the sky … we never imagined this
Now our boy is learning early how to become a man
Such a strong faith, he knows, even when doctors cant – God can
And you know our baby girl, she just breaks down and cries
Every time she sees someone with your innocent blue eyes

We pray for you every single day, sometimes through our tears
But such a peace comes from knowing, we serve a God who hears
I believe He is right beside us – every step on this road
HIS footprints got deeper when we were given this load
And baby, I know you’ve been fighting to hold on a really long time
But don’t give up and you’ll see the top of this mountain was worth the climb

There’s no denying I’m missing you… your smile, your laugh, your touch
Can’t wait til you’re beside me again, I just want to feel you close so much
I want to snuggle up under your arm and lay my head on your chest
And press my ear close to listen to strength manifest
And I honestly wouldn’t trade this because I trust that God knows best
There is an awesome testimony on the other side of this test

So every time I get weary, start getting discouraged or feeling low
I just remind myself that I’ve got front row seats to see an awesome miracle
I look forward to what’s ahead, not getting caught up too much in the cost
When God’ redeems the time – you will see that none was lost

=) Love you baby. <3