a day that went from bad to worse...

We woke up early to take Mike for early labs and doctor appointments. Within an hour of getting his labs drawn, he had bled out all down his chest from the needle prick in his port. The oncologist came in and immediately admitted him to receive platelets and blood. We moved ourselves upstairs and got settled in his room. They expected that it would take 4-5 days to bring his blood levels back to normal. When he was taken out for a CT scan, I went home to grab some items for his stay. It was the worst I had ever seen him. 45 pounds less than he was only 3 weeks ago, he had no color other than all of the petichial hemorrhaging that covered his body from head to toe. His lips were pale and dry and his eyes were dark and blurred. He has not been able to engage in too much conversation over the past few days – mostly dreaming out loud and having hallucinations. I was grateful that he was in good hands to start feeling better.
My mom had offered to run Mike’s clothes and items down to the hospital for me so I was looking forward to a night on the couch with the kids watching the American Idol season premier and then heading down to see Mike after work tomorrow. Then I got the phone call… I had to go outside to answer my cell because of the bad reception inside my house. The voice on the other end was compassionate but direct, “Mrs. Johnson… we have received the results of Michael’s CT scan and there is a subdural hematoma in his brain that is bleeding, so he is being transferred to the critical care unit. We are consulting with the neurosurgeon, but because Michael’s platelets are so low, surgery is not even an option at this point… I am sorry I have to ask you this, but have you prepared Michael’s final wishes?” …
I hung up the phone and I fell to my knees right there in my driveway. Any tears I had been holding back for sake of “being strong” up to that point did not recognize the walls I had attempted to build for them to hide behind. My dear neighbor came over to comfort me and my mom showed up shortly after. I was in a daze – trying to prepare items to take down for Mike, items for me to stay with him, making arrangements for the kids and the dog, calling my boss to make arrangements for work and contacting his family.
Upon arriving I had to wait over an hour to see him. The nurses were frantically treating him, trying to get blood and platelets going as fast as possible. When I finally did get to go back, he was incoherent. The nurse was able to get him awake for a moment because she wanted to confirm that he could identify who we were – which he did – and went back to sleep. I spoke to the doctor and she explained that they are trying to pump the platelets and blood into him enough that it will stabilize him & stop the bleeding. They will do that as long as necessary. At this point, still, surgery is not even being considered.
My mom and I are camping out in the waiting room for the night. I am allowed to go back and visit him at almost any hour with nurse approval. I don’t intend to leave this place until I have gotten a good report that he is improving. Thank you SO MUCH to everyone who has been letting me know that you all are praying. I cannot tell you how encouraging it is. I know that Mike’s life is in God’s hands and I think if we bombard heaven enough, it just might bring the miracle we are hoping and believing for. Please be careful to only speak positive things about Mike’s condition and recovery. We believe that words have creative power and we need to speak that he is going to be just fine, very soon.
Much love to all of you!!!
2 Corinthians 4:16-18
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.